Hello guys today’s post will be a little bit different then the usual ones.When I created this blog, I didn’t know what I was doing; actually I still don’t. However this feeling that I needed to be doing something more kept bugging me. I didn’t know what to do, what it was actually; and out of nowhere this thought came to my mind.
Why don’t I create a blog.? Back when I was younger I created another blog to review non christian books back then. I think I only reviewed one book and I deleted the blog. Now this blog is completely different, because I’m not doing something for the world. This is for the glory and honor of my God.
“And whatever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord and not to men,”
Anyways back to the topic, I didn’t know what I was going to write in it, because to be honest I love english but I don’t think I’m that good at it and I just didn’t have anything to write about. But this little voice kept bugging me and I decided to create one; however I told the Lord that he needed to give me the words of what he wanted me to write. Now many of you guys might think that because, of what I write I might not have my struggles or that I’m living a holy life with the Lord; but I’m here to be raw and honest with you tonight. I’m spiritually weak sometimes it’s hard for me as a christian girl to live his word and commandments in the world today. That doesn’t mean I don’t try my best not to disappoint him and myself. Because sometimes I sin quite often in the way I act, speak or think. This next verse is everything to me when I am feeling ashamed; I know that it’s not just my flesh that I’m fighting against but also that I’m fighting against spiritual being in the spiritual world.
“For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places.”
I have struggled a lot most of the time I don’t understand why.? I was raised since I was a child to believe there was a higher being or God; out there that loved me through thick and thin but at the same time that he was not a God to play with.And I remember that it got hard as I hit my teenage years. I wanted to do everything my friends were doing ; if they were going to dances( no christian stuff) I wanted to go; if they had a boyfriend I wanted one too. However I still had this front or facade as some might call it of going to church; there were times were I just went because, my parents forced me to go I would just go through the motions. As I got older I got into the literature world. I love reading I don’t know where that came from because when I was in middle school I detested even seeing a book. However what happens next shows you that the enemy can use anyone to sink you deeper and take you out from the purpose of what God wants to do with you. When one of my friends showed me a book that she was reading it was a book that had some kind of erotic feel it and I liked it; back then I had stopped searching for the presence of God and it sunk me deeper in the black hole that was my life. I would go to the library and check out adults book that were not meant for my age to read and from there on it would start the struggle of holiness versus wickedness.
1 John 1:7
“But if we walk in the light as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus Christ His Son cleanses us from all sin.”
This will become a battle that will continue for years to come. I never thought that a simple act would give an opening for the enemy to control my life. It has been hard to let this go; I think mostly because I haven’t let the Lord do his job on me. Most people struggle with drugs or alcohol; for example we have the wife of the prophet Hosea; she would sell herself to the highest bidder. But my addiction was these type of books that dirty my soul and mind, I felt ashamed and I still do sometimes. I felt as if I wasn’t worthy of him. It’s a daily struggle my passion is reading it’s what I love to do and I plan on writing my own books later on. But I don’t plan to feel that way my whole life for something that just distanced me from his presence in my life. There are times I caved in and I’m ashamed. However there are times that I have stopped myself. Because I know it’s a door that I let the enemy come through when I wasn’t properly seeking the Lord as I should have. I do have my struggles but, the only one who knows is the one above; even though there is no shame on letting someone know. But be careful in who you confide ; you will want someone who will help you not bring you down. Most of the time we trust the wrong person and we end up worse than before; see that the person you tell has a deeply committed life with the Lord or put it in prayer and the Lord will guide you to that person. I’m ashamed to say I didn’t do that and it brought guilt to my life. Be brave and honest with the person you choose after all they will put you in their prayers so that God give you the strength that you need to come through that trial victorious.
“I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.”
P.S. Let me know in the comments some of your favorites verses of the bible. God Bless & Happy New Year..