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A sincere repentance

In the New Testament we are introduced to a complex character named Judah Iscariot. He is the predestined person who would commit the ultimate betrayal by selling Jesus Christ for a few coins. Judah is a character that is complicated for me as I was never able to grasp his intentions. In the book of Mark we are given the list of the twelve apostles of Jesus Christ, however, it’s until the book of John that we are given knowledge about this disciple.

He is described as the betrayer of Jesus Christ but also as the treasurer of the money for Jesus ministry. It was during the anointing at Bethany where; Mary the sister of Lazarus anoints(cleans) Jesus feet with an expensive perfume that its cost would have been a years income at that time and dried them with her hair. The Bible is pretty spot on when it says that “from the heart speaks the mouth” and we can see the truth in this verses,

5. Why was this fragrant oil not sold for three hundred denarii and given to the poor? 6.” This he said, not that he cared for the poor, but because he was a thief and had the money box, and he used to take what was put in it.”

In Judah’s heart above any other feeling was greed for the money. His lack of love for the poor or needy but instead his desire for more money was his downfall later on.  Judah’s small failings lead to open doors for bigger and evil influences that destroyed his life. Jesus in the book of John identified his betrayer in the washing of his feet and the last supper.

John 13:11

For he knew who would betray him; therefore he said, ” You are not all clean”.

The disciple Judah at the last supper after Jesus Christ said “it is to he to whom I shall give a piece of bread when I have dipped it” and who else than Iscariot. It is stated in the Bible that Satan entered him and after being given the bread. Judah had the possibility of  being saved as the rest of the disciples, however, his greed for the money and him not having a true repentance led him to commit suicide by hanging himself.

In the book of Matthew and Acts,  the Bible gives us details of what happened to him after the betrayal. In verse 3 of chapter 27 of Matthews the Bible says that Judah was remorseful after seeing that he was condemned but it doesn’t say that he had repentance in his heart and wanted to change his way. God works in a sincere heart, in a heart that is open to change. Our iniquities and sin is forgotten when we open up our heart to God and allow him to visit and change us.

In today’s service God restored a family and spoke to a youth that visited us; knowing what transpired it makes me want to work more for God. Let us have a heart full of repentance so that the Holy Spirit may work in our lives.

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P.S. I hope that you like the new post for the series Called with a Purpose. See you guys, in the next post. shalom🕊🕊🕊

Conference Recap😱😱😱

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Hey Y’all, as promised in today’s blog I will be recapping what the girls spoke and a little bit of the lesson that the pastors brought about the differences between obsessions and real love. Some of the topics that were discussed during this conference were abstinence, love, obsession, sexual abuse and much more.

The lesson was based on the story of Tamar and Amnon in the book of 2. Samuel 13. Her story is pretty sad in the sense that her own brother committed the crime of abusing her and not restoring her honor by asking marrying her as was supposed to be done in those times. Amnon’s obsession led him to commit an evil crime that destroyed not only his life but the life of Tamar. How can we differentiate what’s obsession and what’s love?

In 1 of Corinthians 13:4-8, the word gives us the definition of real love.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

As youth and adults, we are tested in different areas of our lives. When someone falls in love it’s a moment of overwhelming feelings. You are happy to be in the company of your beloved, to speak about everything and nothing at all. You want to get to know that person, the butterflies feelings start to be felt in your stomach when you think, see, or spend time together with that person. To be in love is to want to protect, honor, persevere, be patient, kind, humble towards the person that you are in love with. Of course, not everything is a color of rainbows; there will be moments when circumstances will make you do mistakes but overall love never fails to conquer the unconquerable. Amnon’s actions don’t speak much of love of but instead of an attraction that became an obsession towards his half-sister; verse 15 of chapter 13 gives us an insight of his feelings.

Then Amnon hated her with intense hatred. In fact, he hated her more than he had loved her. Amnon said to her, “Get up and get out!”

His reaction and action give testimony of his feelings towards his sister. His so-called “Love” became hatred after having committed the act. We have to learn to differentiate between love and obsession. Sometimes the first step towards a relationship starts with attraction, it could either develop to real love or could become something worse as an obsession. It’s almost as bad as the fans of famous artists that proclaim their love for their stars but a lot of times their actions contradict them; in the end, it became an obsession.

At the conference, we spoke about abstinence in saving ourselves for marriage also about purity. Being pure is not only from abstaining from sex outside of marriage but also your thoughts and emotions. Remember that from the “heart speaks the mouth. ” We might be abstaining from sinning with our body but we are sinning in our hearts and mind. We also spoke a little bit of sexual abuse and it’s side effects to the victims. I spoke of my testimony and how being a victim, completely changed my attitude but also almost took me to a path of change in sexual orientation. By God’s mercy, I am the Ana of today without any type of emotional crisis. When we let God work in our lives and let him actually guide us as he wants we will see the change within us and around us. Influences affected me a lot, however, God never let go of me in my moments of doubt, fear, rebellion, and depression.

What can I say, I had much fun at this conference and cannot wait for the male and female conference that will be held in a few months. Learning to wait in God and his promises, not to rush and actually letting him prepare us for the day that we will be wife or husband to the person he has for us.

P. S. God Bless, hope that everyone has a beautiful weekend. I will be writing the blog post of Called with a purpose this weekend, however, it will not be posted until later in the week as I want to go a little deeper in his story but also it will be my mother’s 50th birthday and we are celebrating it with confetti and food🤪😂😂, just kidding. But we will definitely celebrate it so I want to give her all my attention this weekend.

Giving Thanks 🙏🏼 / Ten Lepers

img_2159Yesterday night was prayer night at my church but before we went into praying; a brother from church brought a small word on the book of Luke about the ten men who had leprosy and Jesus healed them.

12 As he was going into a village, ten men who had leprosy met him. They stood at a distance 13 and called out in a loud voice, “Jesus, Master, have pity on us!”

This chapter in the book of Luke is pretty deep if we actually dwell a little deeper into the word. As the brother who was preaching yesterday was giving quite a few points about this chapter and the reactions of the men, all that God was speaking through him I was thinking and saying to myself this is so true.

Jesus met these ten lepers on his way to Jerusalem, but what caught my attention as the brother was reading was in verse 12; where it says that the men “stood a distance, and lifted up their voices.” As many of you know Jesus was followed everywhere he went by multitudes of people, it was pretty hard for him to walk the roads as everyone wanted to be healed by him. However, these men saw Jesus coming from a distance my question is; How could they have possibly seen him? Just imagining myself being there I cannot comprehend how these men were able to see Jesus from such a distance. Maybe it was the multitude that gave Jesus away or his garments or could it possibly be the way he walked.?

However, it was their faith that made it possible for them to see the Teacher walking by and them asking for mercy. They were not healed at that same spot where they had been waiting instead, they were walking to go to the priests as Jesus had commanded them to do and they were being cleaned. They believed that they would be and they were but out of the ten lepers only one after seeing that he was healed; came back and gave thanks to Jesus for the healing. This man was healed physically but also spiritually as you can see in verse 19,

then he said to him, “Rise and go; your faith has made you well.”

These ten men were all healed physically but only one of them was also healed spiritually. The one that returned back, his faith in Jesus believing that he was the son of God was that restored all of him. Sometimes we see healing happening in our life, it could be spiritually as well physically or emotionally but how many times do we stop to give thanks to God for the healing not only in the physical, emotionally or spiritually but in whole. I find fault within myself in this, as I have seen God work in different areas of my life and even though I am immensely grateful towards him; most of the time I forget to give daily thanks to him for all that he has done or is doing or will continue to do in my life.

This leper his faith plus his giving thanks to the savior restored him from who he was before he encountered Jesus. Are we being restored not just through faith but also thankfulness towards God?

P. S. Thanks for the prayers💕💕💕I been feeling a lot better since last time, unfortunately, I was not able to post my Called with a purpose blog post because being sick is no fun🙄😩😩 and I pretty much just wanted to sleep; however my next character in “Called with a Purpose” post will be our disciple Judas Iscariot but I want to dwell a little deeper in his story before posting it.  He is a character that needs to be scrutinized and I believe I might have to do two parts for him. Also, I have not forgotten about the recap of the girls’ conference I will be posting that tomorrow it will be scheduled tonight for tomorrow.

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News & Updates

Hi guys, I’m back today with a new post. Foremost I want to thank the ones that read my last blog post and had me in your prayers. As many of you know NC was hit with hurricane Florence and the trajectory that the hurricane had at the beginning my area was gonna be hit pretty bad. Unfortunately the hurricane only impacted most of coastal side so let’s continue to pray for the families that lost their home or family members in this Hurricane.

To be truthful I was pretty much at home; I even got a 5 day weekend. My job decided to close down because as I wrote on the top; the hurricane was going to impact us. I have a new post on the Called with a purpose series, which I will be uploading tomorrow; so come and check it out. But the news that I’m rejoicing over is that my second oldest brother who lives in my homeland country is coming to visit us in December. This visit is something that we have been waiting for, it has been 12 years since I last saw him face to face; God does have his perfect timing. I remember last year my mother receive a word of prophecy letting her know that all her children would be reunited; she believed but the situation looked impossible at first; my brother was working on a job that he had a contract on and secondly he did not feel as he would be given the Visa to come to the U.S.A.

He has been a missionary for a couple of years now, and that has also restricted his time in some aspects. To be more concise the time was never right. I’m really excited that he is coming over in December. This weekend I might be able to give you guys a new post as the girls from the youth ministry will be having a youth conference. The pastors and the leaders of the youth decided to speak to the youth about certain topics that are taboo within the church. Many of the youth have questions about topics such as dating, sex, identity crisis and much more. Not all are able to speak to their parents as the Latino community is more reserved than some but it’s something that we need to speak to our youth to grow closer to them.

We see so much damage to the youth and the bad choices that they make because parents do not get involved and the church either. It’s time to stop the world and enemy control the minds of many of the youth inside and outside of church but that will only happen when the church gets their hands dirty instead of maintaining that image of pristine white. I will have a summary of the topics and what type of questions the youth had and I might decide to take some pictures of the event; I’m still indecisive in that area. Well, that’s all my news and updates for right now; stay tuned for tomorrow’s post. Let’s not to forget to show love, compassion and most importantly mercy to those in need.

P.S. Truthfully thankful for all of you; thanks for following on this ride. I ask that you keep me in your prayers as I came down with very bad cold and been having a high fever and aching bones😷😷let me just say that when I get sick it’s just terrible. I seriously hope that it does not affect my health for too long but I’m declaring healing over my body🙏🏼🙏🏼Thanks!!Shalom🕊🕊🕊

What is in your heart? Guest blogger- Israel Ramos

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God bless on this beautiful day; today’s blog post I will have a guest in my blog. He is the vice leader of the youth ministry in my church. I asked that he transformed his preaching of Friday night to a blog post today as through his preaching all of us received on Friday night I also believe that whoever reads this blog will receive from the word .

In Mark 28:34, the word says;

And to love him with all the heart and with all the understanding and with all the strength, and to love one’s neighbor as oneself, is much more than all whole burnt offerings and sacrifices.””
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To understand the message of tonight or today as God directed me to this bible verse to preach on youth Friday I will dwell in four things that we need to work in the ministry. In my work I met a pastor who spoke to me and the words of wisdom that he gave left an impact; he said that many of us have a title; however that most of all believers only say that they are christian and actually do not know their real title and purpose in God.  That all of us are called with a purpose but we need to submerged ourselves deeper into the waters to see the purpose that God has for us because what you might think it’s for you it could actually not be. The main purpose of this preaching or post  is not to only use words but also actions to describe being christ like but also to scrutinize your heart and find the purpose that you have been called to do.

One of the main points is you got to have HEART; you got to love God with all your heart and have a passion. When you love someone you want to let everyone know; you want to shout it out and that’s the same way it should be for God. However what we lack with God, we without restraint give it for the world or for things that have no meaning. It’s really beautiful the first stage of falling in love as you can’t stop thinking about the person that you are interested in or can’t stop talking about that person to family members, friends or even telling that person. How many times do you proclaim your love for Jesus to the unbelievers or the world? Do you proclaim it when you feel its necessary? When you remind yourself? Or all the time? As you are grateful for what he has done in your life. As humans we are fickle minded and also selfish it’s a flaw and work of the flesh but when we come to God we are created as a new creature in him.

Second point is our Desire in Proverbs 8:11 says;

“for wisdom is better than jewels, and all that you may desire cannot compare with her.”

in this verse it talks about wisdom but also our desire. Just by  having wisdom is better than having materialistic stuff that will not go with you at the end. The desires of our flesh or wants for things that are passing through will not help us in times of tribulation. One thing that King Solomon asked of God when he became king was not the riches of the world but to be wise in guiding the people of Israel and he was tested in the situation with the two women and the child in 1 of Kings 3:16-28. Wisdom will give you the words and strength to keep moving forward as also help you in times of need.

The third point is FAITH. In Matthew 17:20; Jesus chastise the disciples after encountering a man who  had brought his son to Jesus to be delivered as the disciples were not able to because of their lack of faith.

“He said to them, “Because of your little faith. For truly, I say to you, if you have faith like a grain of mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move, and nothing will be impossible for you.””
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Faith is an important aspect in our walk with Jesus; it’s through faith and grace that we are able to call God our father. Another example is the disciple Thomas; that after Jesus having presented/showed himself before the other disciples and him not being present he said he would not believe he had resurrected if he was not able to touch his wounds and his side.

“Then Jesus told him, “Because you have seen me, you have believed; blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believe”

Always remember that God has called you to the ministry; because you are able to deliver what he wants from you. Our faith could be as a mustard seed or a grain of sand so small, but God’s faith in you is bigger and more powerful than anything. Many times of our lives we have God showing us his love and mercy in each daily thing  but we still doubt him and his work.

Last point is Never Stop; doing what God has called you to do. It’s so important that you believe this and engraved it deep into your heart; their will be moments of insecurity, fear, doubt but God is always there in the midst of all. Keep moving forward and continue to grow where he has planted you and you will see God’s hand at work.

All my life I spoke or said that God was my Lord and savior; I let everyone know who he was but spiritually I never grew. I was not doing anything I was only seeing and hearing the words come out of my mouth. The first time I truly felt his presence was one time in worship. When I felt this warmth inside my body and I started to shout and praise; I realized that is not only through words but also action I will show of God. I started to do it more and more at church, home, work and that’s when I started to see the growth in my spiritual life. God started to use me in songs, preachings, motivational speaking to the youth. I’m not letting fear stop me; I’m asking myself daily what’s in my heart? Am I hearing God? Seeing him work? Those are my questions to myself but I ask that you go deep within your heart and scrutinize and ask ; What’s In my Heart?

P.S. Thanks to my brother Israel Ramos for this beautiful message that he brought to the youth and congregation on Friday; I believe that God will continue to use him more and more within the ministry of the youth as his own. I ask that you keep my family and I as well the North Carolina residents in your prayers as we are in the trajectory of hurricane Florence. I’m at peace in knowing that God is covering us with his precious blood; however there are people who unfortunately can’t say the same. Keep us in prayer I’m hoping that the hurricane will not affect badly my city as I don’t want to be without power😞😞😭😭but we shall see by tomorrow. God bless and I shall see you in next blog post, Shalom🕊🗣

Who are you in God?

784a5e12-eeac-43e4-9ac3-006f58472206Good morning on this beautiful day, today I will be writing about an issue that many youths, young adults and adults have gone through or are going through this moment in our lives. I will be speaking in the book of 1. Samuel 1:5-8. Hannah was the favored wife of Elkanah an Ephraimite; however, God had closed her womb and she was barren. Now this man had two wives; the second wife would belittle and provoke each time the family would go to give sacrifices to the Lord at Shiloh; Hannah would become sad and she would weep bitterly.

And she was in bitterness of soul, and prayed unto the Lord, and wept sore.11And she vowed a vow, and said, O Lord of hosts, if thou wilt indeed look on the affliction of thine handmaid, and remember me, and not forget thine handmaid, but wilt give unto thine handmaid a man-child, then I will give him unto the Lord all the days of his life, and there shall no razor come upon his head.

Hannah was a woman who had been mistreated not by her husband but by her husband’s second wife and had a view of her self as someone not worthy because she was barren and could not give her husband lineage from her. Hannah’s sorrow and low self-esteem became a tool in God’s hand as he remembered his servant and she was able to conceive.

Many times we doubt ourselves and we do not know who we are in God because of our low self-esteem. We have a distorted view of ourselves as objects of no great importance that cannot come up to something, but that is not who we are in God; in Genesis 1:27 it says;

So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.

We were created by God and to resemble him not in physicality as God is Spirit but in spiritual qualities as well as moral and mental obedience to worldly laws. Low self-esteem comes from different causes for example;

  1. Physical Features: we as humans are so focused on our image that we distorted what beauty is and we scrutinize ourselves and find flaws in our person. Proverbs  31:30  says; ” Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised.” We do not consist of only flesh but spirit also; someone who might be beautiful on the outside could be ugly on the inside; that leads us to our next point.
  2. Emotional, Physical and Substance abuse: Sometimes we make choices that bring a lot of pain into our lives. We might be in a relationship that becomes abusive mentally, emotionally and physically. This relationship can be a friendship, parental, dating or even work environment. This type of abuse will lead us to have a low self-esteem and will make us want to subdue or escape the pain in any which way and takes us to substance abuse. Many try to forget the pain by looking for oblivion in drugs or alcohol which instead of helping just makes everything worse as that could become an addiction or could bring a lot more severe consequences later on. This brings us to our next point which is,
  3. Tragic Past: Sometimes we have a low self-esteem because of the actions of our past that we have done or have been done to us. When I was younger I had a distorted view of myself because of my past; I thought I was unworthy of love or affection. I saw myself as ugly and lacking in everything; my friendships became my cornerstone which was unhealthy as I was depending on someone else for my happiness.
  4. Sin: From experience, I can testify that sin leaves deep scars that make you feel unworthy and give you low self-esteem. Many times when I remembered all that I had done during my teenage years I would get sad because of the choices that I made; I had to travel a harder road and also that brought my self- esteem low in my personal life as well in my ministry. I felt like a dirty, unclean and tattered rag that was unwanted.

Hannah’s low self-esteem and afflictions became God’s tool. There is a verse that Hannah says is chapter 2 of 1. Samuel and it’s;

Talk no more so exceeding proudly; let not arrogance come out of your mouth: for the Lord is a God of knowledge, and by him actions are weighed.

We might have a beautiful face and our self-esteem could be up to the roof but if our hearts and actions don’t reflect God what is the point of all. God looks into the inside and not the outside; he knows our every thought and desires. We might be able to fool men but not him.

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P.s. Thank you for hanging out with me today; hope to see you on my next blog post which will be a ” Called with a purpose” post. Remember that you are worthy of love and mercy; that God gave his begotten son for you and me in the cross. Don’t let opinion nor words of discouragement bring you down; instead, remember that you were chosen by him and through him, you have been saved. Shalom

Rebuild Your Walls➕➕

img_0189God bless all of you on this beautiful day; as promised on the last blog post in today’s Called with a Purpose post I will be speaking in the book of Nehemiah;  about Nehemiah and his call to rebuild the walls of Jerusalem after they had been destroyed by the Babylonians. As a lot of you probably know he was the cupbearer to the King of Persia Artaxerxes son of Xerxes husband of Esther.

In the first chapter of the book of Nehemiah, it says that after he asked and heard the news about Jerusalem and the people who were sent to exile; he wept and prayed and fasted to the Lord. From verse 5 to 7 you can read and see how his prayer was to God but what calls my attention is verse 6 to 7;

let your ear be attentive and your eyes open to hear the prayer your servant is praying before you day and night for your servants, the people of Israel. I confess the sins we Israelites, including myself and my father’s family, have committed against you.We have acted very wickedly toward you. We have not obeyed the commands, decrees and laws you gave your servant Moses.

What calls my attention is on the second line of verse 6; where he tells the Lord, ” I confess the sins we Israelites, including myself and my father’s family, have committed against you.” Why was Nehemiah admitting to those sins is the question I ask myself? One thing I have learned in spiritual warfare is that the sins and bondage of past ancestors are still present in our lives and if they are not broken it still has the power to keep us in chains.  One sentence that I use in my prayer is; ” Father at this hour in the name of Jesus Christ and with the authority given to me; I asked that any chain or bondage that is dragging from past generations be broken in Jesus name. ” Another thing that I ask myself is; why was he asking God to turn his ear towards his prayer and to keep his eyes open?. As we know God is a God of mercy and has always been; however the people of Israel always broke the covenant that God had made with them and they didn’t listen when he sent word of repentance through the prophets

Nehemiah was not only praying for the rebuilding of physical walls but also for the spiritual ones. The walls of the nation of Israel were destroyed because of their disobedience through the idolatry of other pagan gods; they didn’t have the ear of the Father anymore. Their relationship with God had crumbled and they needed to build those walls of prayer and communication with God also before the rebuilding of the physical walls. Remember after all; this nation has always been his chosen nation.

He has always responded to their cries and prayers when they actually come to him with a heartfelt repentance. He has always provided for them in times of need and desperation. Nehemiah brings  to mind the command that he gave to Moses to give to the children of Israel in verse 8 and 9 saying;

‘If you are unfaithful, I will scatter you among the nations, but if you return to me and obey my commands, then even if your exiled people are at the farthest horizon, I will gather them from there and bring them to the place I have chosen as a dwelling for my Name.’

However in verse ten; Nehemiah says “they are your servants and your people, whom you redeemed by your great strength and your mighty hand”Almost as if asking God to have pity on them as Nehemiah would go before the King and he wanted the King to show favor and let him go to rebuild the walls with his permission but foremost God’s. Later in chapter 2 of Nehemiah, it seems as God heard his petition because the King saw in his expression when Nehemiah took to him his cup that his expression was of sadness but not of illness instead of heartbreak. And God put favor in the sight of the King for Nehemiah as the King granted Nehemiah the request to rebuild the walls of Jerusalem.

Rebuilding the walls did not only take Nehemiah to do it but everyone else; if you read the whole book of Nehemiah you will see that he involved the priests, families and even conflict and opposition were involved in the rebuilding of those walls. The priests were the first to volunteer to rebuild the walls; families got involved and rebuilt sections of the walls as a sign of ownership. How are we rebuilding the spiritual walls of our nation, community, family, and church? Are we involved or are we just seeing from the outside the work that other people are doing? Opposition and conflict rose up in the time of rebuilding; however, did that stop, Nehemiah, from completing the purpose of his call?

Actually, all the opposition and conflict instead made him stay more in the purpose that God had put in him. We have to learn to overcome the conflict’s and circumstances, the injustice that may appear in our way. At the end of all Nehemiah rebuilt the walls and purified the people of Israel just as God wanted, and all that he desired was for God so remember him in favor for all that he had done and for obeying his call and fulfilling it. Let’s scrutinize ourselves and see if we are obeying the call that God has put in our hearts and how are we rebuilding the walls of our community and country but foremost it should be our family; how are you rebuilding the walls of those who have theirs destroyed?

P.S. I hope that this post brings blessing to your life. Let me know your thoughts in the comment section at the bottom; would love to hear from you. Show kindness and love to someone from the time of right now in one aspect of their lives. Shalom🕊